Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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