Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
