Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
My life is pants optional.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
