only if we run a train.
done.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
