some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
