i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize