Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
