how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Randomize
