I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
