apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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