Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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