Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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