bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
