shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Did you pee in the oven last night??
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