There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
