ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
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