Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
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