worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
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if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
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I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
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