She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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