yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
