I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
