If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
