Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
You need a sexual gate keeper
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Randomize
