girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
