Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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