Texts From Last Night

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  (916): View more from California

  You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil

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  (916): You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil http://tfl.nu/tid3
  Replies (5) Good night (946) Bad night (484)
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police

  (616): View more from Michigan

  What?!?

  (810): View more from Michigan

  What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police

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  (810): Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police (616): What?!? (810): What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police http://tfl.nu/unre
  Replies (20) Good night (4615) Bad night (800)
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  (949): View more from California

  After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(

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  (949): After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =( http://tfl.nu/pv1c
  Replies (43) Good night (645) Bad night (5363)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  why does my vagina smell like weed?

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  omg thats a great idea

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  (610): why does my vagina smell like weed? (215): omg thats a great idea http://tfl.nu/ft3y
  Replies (30) Good night (4315) Bad night (811)
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  (408): View more from California

  Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.

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  (408): Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0. http://tfl.nu/rypw
  Replies (30) Good night (4544) Bad night (877)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'

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  (248): my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you' http://tfl.nu/ael6
  Replies (25) Good night (2732) Bad night (5632)
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  (619): View more from California

  he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house

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  (619): he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house http://tfl.nu/t2gc
  Replies (3) Good night (3281) Bad night (766)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro

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  (678): The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro http://tfl.nu/6idu
  Replies (13) Good night (3702) Bad night (1104)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.

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  (407): I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls. http://tfl.nu/jhsp
  Replies (6) Good night (1571) Bad night (692)
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....

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  (810): Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that..... http://tfl.nu/0b0j
  Replies (3) Good night (1384) Bad night (820)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it

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  (815): Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it http://tfl.nu/8nv8
  Replies (16) Good night (2345) Bad night (626)
• Favorite

  (562): View more from California

  Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.

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  (562): Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid. http://tfl.nu/2ztg
  Replies (23) Good night (2048) Bad night (983)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."

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  (613): We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet." http://tfl.nu/xflq
  Replies (3) Good night (1581) Bad night (793)
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  (858): View more from California

  This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.

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  (858): This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars. http://tfl.nu/bno3
  Replies (9) Good night (1767) Bad night (569)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam

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  (416): Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam http://tfl.nu/r47y
  Replies (1) Good night (474) Bad night (297)

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