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• (443): View more from Maryland

  sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  I know, I was there.

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I am puke

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• (440): View more from Ohio

  i wish there were pregnant emoticons

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive

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• 

  27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (609): View more from New Jersey

  It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.

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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.

  (703): View more from Virginia

  mine is 'the'.

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• (925): View more from California

  I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.

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• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.

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• (416): View more from Toronto

  I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.

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• 

  23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (662): View more from Mississippi

  I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.

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• (903): View more from Texas

  All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.

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• (607): View more from New York

  I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!

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