i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
