No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
this beer tastes like vomit already
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Randomize
