That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
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I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
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I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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