I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
