Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
