i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
