In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
