can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
