idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
