PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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