I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
