being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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