$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize