i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Randomize
