Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
