nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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