I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize