Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
