it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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