A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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