I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
