Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
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