dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
her facebook's as public as her vagina
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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