Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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